Introduction
The way ecclesias approach remarriage after divorce is crucial to maintaining both biblical integrity and pastoral sensitivity. While some traditions impose strict prohibitions, others emphasise grace and case-by-case discernment. This article explores how remarriage should be approached within ecclesial communities.
Who are we to say?
We can’t read minds and do not have the spirit gifts to determine what people’s intent was. In some circumstances it could be reasonable to challenge someone’s intent (in a brotherly way) if there is a close proximity or direct connection to their adultery. We know that there is a time of judgement:
“Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.” (1 Corinthians 4:5)
“On that day when, according to my gospel, God judges the secrets of men by Christ Jesus.” (Romans 2:6)
"The sins of some people are conspicuous, going before them to judgment, but the sins of others appear later." (1 Timothy 5:24)
These passages support the idea that not all sins are fully evident now, and final judgment belongs to Christ at His return. We do not have to conclusively determine there was immorality, abuse or abandonment. Of course, the conscience of those involved should be clear, but there is no sense in which this most shame-inducing experience in a person’s life must be disclosed in full gory detail to the ecclesia or the elders only so as to avoid ecclesial action for choosing to initiate a divorce.
One of the difficulties ecclesias face is determining when remarriage is appropriate. Since no ecclesia has the authority to judge the inner hearts of individuals, decisions should be based on observable circumstances and scriptural principles. Supposition should be avoided. Ecclesias are not courts and should refrain from excessive scrutiny.
When is Remarriage Biblically Permissible?
Remarriage is permissible when a divorce has occurred for legitimate, biblically justified reasons such as:
Sexual immorality (Matthew 19:9)
Abandonment by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15)
Abuse and betrayal of the covenant (Psalm 11:5, Colossians 3:19)
However, remarriage undertaken for selfish, faithless reasons is not condoned by Scripture (Malachi 2:16).
Ecclesial Leadership and Remarriage
While remarried individuals are welcomed in ecclesias, certain leadership roles may require additional considerations.
"Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach." (1 Timothy 3:2)
This passage does not necessarily prohibit remarried individuals from leadership but emphasises the importance of moral reputation and faithfulness.
Separation and divorce also signals unavoidable evidence of a failing on the part of the husband. He has proved himself unable to “live with his wife in an understanding way” (1 Peter 3:7). We have an obligation to lead all sinners to repentance with empathy and understanding. Peter’s words may provide the impetus to engage with such a brother in that circumstance.
Conclusion
Ecclesias should uphold biblical principles while extending grace and understanding. Remarriage is not inherently sinful but should be approached with wisdom and reverence.
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